Salvage Heart: Cause I don't even wanna try to get by without you

Home, Studied, Chem sux, Jo Jas Su Shu Sherie Sarah, Bugis, Ate at Yoshinoya, Cabbed to supposedly Marina Barage whatever that is, Lost, Marina @ Keppel bay in the end, beautiful place, Pictures, Mom's a bitch, Cabbed home. Yup, thats my day.

Ahh, sometimes I really wish I can tell my mom how I really feel and what freedom really is...to her, I think freedom means I let you out at 7pm-8pm, be home by 10pm. I don't do this everyday. Everytime I come home, chores are there. Waiting for me. And the thing is, its not like I don't do them. Yeah, I whine, I complain why me, but the fact that I do your chores, and I study, my results are totally okay, but no, you wouldn't let me out just half an hour more. It pisses me off EVERYTIME, and I mean EVERYTIME when I look at my brothers, and realise that they are doing nothing but games, eat, sleep, laugh, talk, play. I mean hey whats this...My cousins do chores. They are all guys. My mom has that mentality that GIRLS MUST DO CHORES BCOS THEY ARE GIRLS. Oh mai god then throw your sons away, they are of no use! If I'm the only girl, I would be totally understanding, I wouldn't reason out to my mom why I shouldn't do it...but look here. I have two siblings, one aged 19 and 11, even the 11 is so much more better but he hardly does anything unless told and bugged like 2983928 times, the fucked up 19 one does nothing but stick his big pimpled ass on the chair infront of the computer.

I am totally sick of this, everytime I try so hard to tell my mom how i feel and that i hate this feeling, it never works. She'll never listen. Haha, thats probably the reason why I'm so not open towards her. When I pierced my tongue, well its closed but anyway, I told her, she wasn't cool with it. Why I didn't tell her is because I know her reaction. Yeah, its typical. She'll ground me, no wait she doesn't know what grounding is hahah or she'll just say "I trusted you so much...nehnheneheneh" and what, say I can't do this and that and all those shit. This totally proves how much she knows and cares about me. How sad. She doesn't ask me "Hows your day?" only when I complain she'll ask once in a while "How's your exams?" I'll go "Me??? Are you sure you're asking me??" She will be like "Yeah..." And there i'll be, shocked, because it felt like a million years since she asked me that...no wait. She never did asked these questions that would actually just make my day..even Love You would totally make me happy. But nope, I'm always the one ending the call with "Love you!! Muacks muacks byebye :)" She'll just put the phone down.

How sad, how sad.
Does anyone know how I feel?
Sometimes, I hate being a girl, sometimes, I even wonder what if I'm a boy? Will mom let all her 3 boys sit and rot? Or make them work and be useful? Haha. Well thats just a thought. I do love my mom and I'd do anything for her. I just feel that its just too much this time. Ahh anyway, I know it can never happen, the 3 brothers thingo. So yeah yeah Jolyn, dream on, just dream on.....
I guess I'll be stuck in this life...till I'm 'old enough'. Man. Just when will that be?
Sorry readers (if theres any) to have to rant so much. Just one person who understands how i feel is all it takes to make me feel better :(

Okay, its supposed to be about my day today, sorry, went totally offtrack... We got lost at Marina @ Keppel Bay. Swear its a beautiful place. Here are the pictures. Oh yeah, some were ytd pics, just found it.